How Do You Do It? – Parenting Multiple Children {Guest Post}

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Today I had a friend exclaim again “I don’t know how you do it with four kids, I can barely keep up with my two.”

I think we moms often marvel at how other moms do it with more kids or less resources or maybe without a spouse to help.  My typical response to the question “How do you do it?” is with God’s grace – because really everything good that I do is only possible with His grace.  But this time I felt compelled to go further in my answer.

Parenting is hard.  I feel now just like I did when I only had 2 – or even just one child.  In hindsight I see now that it was easier but I didn’t KNOW it was easier, and it sure didn’t seem easier when I was in the midst of it all.

Because if you are mothering ‘right,’ then you are giving of yourself all day and sometimes all night long too.  You are giving until you don’t think you can give anymore and then somehow you find more to give – and mothers of one child give selflessly just like mothers of 8+ give selflessly.  We give it all And God gives us more to give.  We are vessels of love that are continuously poured out and filled up again and that process changes us.  We have a greater capacity to love, to give, and to sacrifice.  And it is hard, but it is miraculous in how it works.

So next time you think, ‘Oh I couldn’t possibly have more kids,’ or you catch yourself judging someone who has her hands impossibly full with noses to wipe and Sippy cups to fill… realize that we grow and develop our craft of motherhood with each child and each challenge.  You are a better person now than before you had children, and each child contributes to your growth in a unique way.  So marvel if you want, but don’t be afraid or dismayed… because Moms of Many thrive when they embrace the changes and they are rewarded with the wisdom that comes with each gift of life.

Moms of Many thrive when they embrace the changes, and they are rewarded with the wisdom that comes with each gift of life. <— Tweet this.

photo used with permission from the lovely Jillian of Paxbaby.

This is a guest post from MaryRuth Hackett, who is a wife of 13+ year and a full-time mom to her 4 children. She has a PhD in Education reflecting her passion for Lifespan Human Development. In her academic life she researches, reads, & writes about child development, parenting, identity development and program evaluation. She is a soccer mom who has recently discovered gardening and is an avid reader, although her literature choices are lately limited to the likes of Margaret Wise Brown and Sandra Boynton.

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MaryRuth

MaryRuth Hackett is a wife of 13+ year and a full-time mom to her 4 children. She has a PhD in Education reflecting her passion for Lifespan Human Development.In her academic life she researches, reads, & write about child development, parenting, identity development and program evaluation.She is a soccer mom who has recently discovered gardening and is an avid reader although her literature choices are lately limited to the likes of Margaret Wise Brown and Sandra Boynton.

Comments

  1. says

    i often wonder the opposite… how do people parent just one or none? two was easier than one for me, although im sure 3 (and being outnumbered) is going to be a challenge at first!

  2. says

    I appreciate this post so much! I only have one right now and some days are so difficult! When Ted was only a few weeks and I was exhausted I had a friend with four kids say to me, “You don’t know what tired is. Just wait until you have more.” Talk about discouraging and making me want to bawl my eyes out! Parenting has it’s ups and downs no matter how many kids or what ages they are.

  3. says

    Thank you for this post – I am due with boy # 4 within weeks – and I found myself nodding to everything you wrote. I tell people that we all have the same 24 hours in a day – I just manage my differently than someone who has less kids. There are things we don’t always have time to do with our kids – granted – but then they are learning other valuable life lessons along the way.
    Tove Maren Stakkestad recently posted…“it is just a phase”My Profile

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